Saying that this was "a disappointment" would be an understatement. "Holding back tears of frustration at mile 21" is a little bit more accurate, but still isn't quite adequate. Some days just aren't made for sub-4:00 efforts, I guess, and Saturday definitely was one of them.

I don't think it actually occurred to me how rough of a day it was going to be until about mile 20. The day started out fairly mild, and as someone else said, "when I walked out of my hotel in my race outfit in the morning and felt comfortable, that should have been a bad sign." It was shorts and tank top weather at the start, and very, very humid. The race started 15 minutes late, which was super annoying, especially since we had already been standing around for a fairly significant amount of time by then. The gun went off and we were moving.

We missed the 1 mile marker and the first water stop. Things were a little bit congested at the start. I liked this race a lot better last year when there were 66% of the participants. I feel like they expanded the field a lot, but not the space the runners had to run in or the support on the course. I found it really difficult to get through the water stops in the first half (before we dropped the half marathon runners) without running into people and getting clobbered.

Right around mile 2 they narrowed the road we were running on and the level of congestion became similar to that in Chicago. I cannot tell you how much this irritated me. I had to jump to the sidewalk to get around people and maintain a decent pace. I noticed in the first few miles that I was already sweating like crazy (which made missing the first water stop even worse) and my face felt like I was burning up. We crossed the 2-mile point at 17:55, right on 3:55 marathon pace.

The next few miles thinned out a bit and weren't so bad. I focused on slowing down just a tad and getting into a comfortable rhythm. Splits were as follows:
Mile 3 - 9:06
Mile 4 - 9:13
Mile 5 - 9:05

The next two miles had some decent rolling uphills/downhills as well as a fairly noticeable headwind:
Mile 6 - 9:13
Mile 7 - 9:20

When I saw that 9:20 I realized we had slacked off a bit (we had seen some people we knew and husband was chatting with an old friend from Kansas in this mile) so I tried to refocus.
Mile 8 - 8:59

Here's where we entered the park. Words cannot describe how much I dislike this park. It came in the earlier miles last year and was a complete cluster-f@#$, so I was disappointed to see it on the race course again this year. Don't get me wrong, it's a pretty park, but the path going through it is only big enough for about 4 people to run abreast. They do mow the grass on the edges, so you can pass on the grass if necessary, but it's just generally really congested and annoying and I'm always worried about turning an ankle in the grass. Organizers suggested that moving it a few miles later in the course would mean the crowd would be more thinned out, which is great in theory, but when you increase registration numbers by 50%, moving the path back "a few miles" isn't going to do much good. I felt like I wasted SO MUCH energy over the next few miles passing people and trying to maneuver around people, and ended up with slow splits to show for it.
Mile 9 - 9:17
Mile 10 - 9:26

I was totally annoyed and irritated coming out of the park and really just wanted to focus on getting a good rhythm established again and getting back on track. I wasn't too worried about time because I knew I had about 20 seconds banked and I am generally a negative splitter in the back half. Ha! Little did I know that it wasn't one of those "negative split" kind of days.

At mile 11 we saw some friends on the course and that was a nice boost. I smiled and waved and kept on trucking though, trying to stay comfortable and on pace.
Mile 11 - 9:02

I was really happy to lose the half runners between miles 11 and 12.
Mile 12 - 9:09
Mile 13 - 9:08
13.1 - 1:59:58

I was right on pace at the half, but was feeling a bit dehydrated and fatigued. Aside from the first water station (which we missed), I had been grabbing water at every water station (about every two miles) and had taken a salt tablet every hour along with a gel at miles 5 and 10. Regardless, I was still feeling it and knew that I had to start grabbing at least two cups of water at each aid station from there on out. Two miles between water stops just didn't provide enough hydration on a day like today. I was feeling a little worn out, but thought it was mostly mental and that I'd be able to pull through it with a bit of water and a gel coming up at mile 15.

Mile 14 - 9:14
Mile 15 - 9:10

Gelled shortly after mile 15 and took several cups of water and actually felt pretty decent. I realized I was about 10 seconds off pace, but actually felt like I could make the time up if I got a second wind. I picked up the pace and was passing people left and right, but still wasn't even going that fast!
Mile 16 - 9:14
Mile 17 - 9:19

There was a water stop right at mile 17 and it was here that I realized that after I got water in my system the next mile was generally a bit faster and then I'd eventually slow down as miles passed without water. It was a real mental struggle through mile 17, but I STILL felt like my muscles were ok, I wasn't feeling sore, I *could* pick up the pace if I wanted to, but my brain just wanted me to stop and walk. I was fighting with myself mentally to go faster, because I felt like I *should* be going faster, but the heat was just not letting me do it.
Mile 18 - 9:07

I crossed mile 18 with a decent split and was about 21 seconds off pace and I thought to myself, "ok, you can do this. you just need to pull 9:05's from here on in and you can still go sub-4:00." I felt that if I could just get my brain on board, I could definitely get my body to follow through. I wasn't hurting so much as I was just tired.
Mile 19 - 9:14
Right after mile 19 there was a water stop and I knew that if I didn't stop to get as much fluid in me as possible that the rest of the day wasn't going to go well. This water stop also happened to have water bottles instead of cups, which I find more difficult to drink from than the cups which I can run with on-the-go. I stopped to walk while drinking the whole 20 ounces of water, which made mile 20 a slow mile.
Mile 20 - 9:51

This is where I realized that sub-4:00 was not meant to be for that day. Just like that, within a span of a mile, all goals went out the window and it turned into a "just finish" kind of day. I knew that I had to switch from trying to hit a goal to just general survival, and the next few miles were not very pretty.
Miles 21 & 22 - 20:11

I walked through the aid stations at both mile 21 and 22. I was running the miles between at about 10:00 pace and was just mentally trying to run all of the distance between aid stations. At one point in this stretch I looked up and every single person I saw on the road in front of me was walking. Not one single person was running. I was really disappointed in myself at this point because I realized it wasn't even going to be a PR day, but seeing everyone else struggling like that was comforting, at least. A friend (Oblivion) caught up to me right before the aid station at mile 22 and I asked him if it was just me or if it was horrible day and he said that it was just brutal out there. I can't express how comforting this was. Up until this point, even after seeing all of those people walking, I really honestly thought I just wasn't prepared to sub-4:00. The next few miles everything just hurt, my hips, my muscles, my legs, my feet. I was just plain exhausted and really was just focusing still on jogging until I hit the next water station.
Mile 23 - 11:08
Miles 24 & 25 - 23:27

As I stopped to walk through the water stations I'd look back, hoping to see my husband or friends catching up to me but didn't see anyone. I realized that they must be having just as bad of a day to not be catching up. I must have not been thinking logically, because it took me forever to realize that EVERYONE was having that kind of day.

I was not a very happy runner at any point during the day, but I got really pissed off through the last mile and change because a young girl running the relay passed me and got tons of cheers from the crowd. Then little old me, who was doing FOUR TIMES THE DISTANCE would run right behind her and get no cheers at all. I cannot tell you how irritated I was with that little girl throughout the last mile. I can laugh about it now, but it wasn't very funny to me at the time.
Miles 26 & .2 - 12:20

I had to hold back tears of frustration at the finish. No sub-4:00. No corral start at Chicago. No PR. I didn't even beat my Chicago '09 time, when I had taken almost a 5 week taper to get married and hardly ran at all. What a horrible disappointment.

Got to hang out at the finish with some friends and they lifted my spirits. It was clear watching people come in that it was a rough day for everyone. I'm glad I had such great people to hang out with, though... they really helped me not focus on my disappointment and focus on the fact that I finished, which is an accomplishment in itself, especially on a day like that.