- Site:
- http://bit.ly/kITf5o
- Miles:
- 2030 total / 268 in 2012
- Goal:
Balance my lifestyle. Live hard; play hard.
Mike Collins ran: Immediately upon depa...
Dailymile makes it easy to keep track of your workouts. Map your routes and share with a community of active people.
- 12 miles
- 01:55 time
- 09:10 pace
- 1876 calories
- details
Immediately upon departure from my doorstep, a pleasant, plump little snowflake named Burl introduced himself to me. He asked, "Do you mind if I accompany you on your run, friend?" I enthusiastically replied "Yes!" as I was running this one alone and figured the company would keep my mind off of the distance. As I ran, Burl danced happily alongside my right shoulder regaling me with stories of his life as a snowflake. He explained his crowning achievement was being the tippy-top snowflake of a child's snowman from the 1st week of January through the 2nd week of February. He chortled heartily when he saw the perspiration forming on my brow. He said, "Friend, looks like you've got some future snowflakes forming there!" We both laughed and laughed.
Sadly, at about mile 6, Burl said, "Mike, I'm sorry I have to leave you, but it's time for me to hit the pavement. But don't worry, my time there is short and soon I'll be resurrected as a snowflake again. Until then, safe travels my friend!"
Burl was laid to rest at the Greenfield Golf Course clubhouse just along the Oak Leaf Trail. I stopped for a short moment, shed a small tear, smiled about our good times, and turned and headed for home. Here's where the story takes a tragic turn...
You see, Burl was loved by many other flakes, and because I had befriended their beloved pal, they were jealous and upset. Even though it's 2010, I guess the snowflake world just isn't ready for snowflake/human relationships. As I progressed towards home, millions of angry snowflakes slapped, spanked, and swiped my eyes, nose, and cheeks. Battered was I; there were just too many of them for me to fight back. My only choice was to put my head down and plow through the little bastards as I forged my way home. I was fortunate enough to have one secret weapon: LCD Soundsystem. The little icy shits never saw it coming for LCD Soundsystem gave me the strength of 10 men! Finally, after battling the little jagged ice crystal creatures for 6 miles, I triumphantly returned home. My clothes wet and stained with the innards of the little vermin.
The moral of the story? Never make friends with a fat snowflake unless you're headed for home.
Seriously, I didn't put anything odd in his orange juice this morning...
about 2 years ago • Like
Mike, you are my new favorite person. I just wanted you to know. :-)
about 2 years ago • Like
You are crazy. I love it
about 2 years ago • Like
Is this what they mean when they say "runner's high"?
about 2 years ago • Like
DM needs to set up a category for best workout summary. I'd nominate you. Very creative!
about 2 years ago • Like
I miss Burl already.
about 2 years ago • Like
Haha...too funny! I freakin' love it! Where do you come up with this stuff...very cool. And nice run too! Way to kick those little shits butts!
about 2 years ago • Like
I am certain you think of these things on long runs. They are hysterical. I can't wait to read the post after your 20 miler. Thanks for the great humor Mike.
about 2 years ago • Like
OMG How funny. This post has to rank as one of the funnest on DM. You've must have had a great 12 mile run to think this one up! Great job Mike, enjoy the rest of your day.
about 2 years ago • Like
Thanks for the feedback! I like to make it fun, otherwise I might lose interest. And yes, I do think of this stuff while running. ;)
about 2 years ago • Like
When I saw you had a lengthy post I rushed right into reading it. I know from reading your previous posts that they usually are good humor. What I noticed now and should comment on as well is the great pace you ran. Your mind was racing but the legs were going darn good too. ;) Great job Michael
about 2 years ago • Like
LOL I love it! And great run by the way!
about 2 years ago • Like
Good run and story!!
about 2 years ago
How many WTFs did you have before this run? ;-) That's an amazing pace as well! I didn't realize I'd been holding you back so much on our runs together.
about 2 years ago • Like
You're officially one of my favorite people on DM. You never fail to crack me up!!
about 2 years ago • Like
LOL. This is the best run report I've read on here so far! Also, that is a fantastic run, great work.
about 2 years ago • Like
OMG. ROFL. Oh, yeah....nice run too! Wow, you really went over the hump and put out great times and miles every run!! No more #pushmike :)
about 2 years ago • Like
I thought I tried to send this before... not sure where it went. But anyway, you're an uber great story-teller. I think you should consider turning this into a song about Burl.....
about 2 years ago